


Silver-Haired Warriors

by lilsamarooo



Category: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Cursed Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Gen, Hurt Jaskier | Dandelion, I will make that into a tag all by myself if I have to, M/M, Not Beta Read, One Shot, Pre-Slash, Protective Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Rated For Violence, True Love's Kiss, smol jaskier
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-05
Updated: 2020-09-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:21:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26294800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilsamarooo/pseuds/lilsamarooo
Summary: Moonlight bounced off the silhouette as the clouds cleared, revealing a marble statue of a muscular man, donned in armor and wielding a sword in one hand, the other strapped to his back. The man’s lips were twisted into a scowl and his fists were clenched tightly, like he was bracing himself.Or,Jaskier stumbles upon a marble statue in a cursed garden, and a starving demigod out for his blood forces him to try his hand at true love’s kiss.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Comments: 53
Kudos: 327
Collections: The Witcher Alternate Universes





	Silver-Haired Warriors

**Author's Note:**

> Have fun with this one! It’s like a weird twist on Medusa’s turn to stone thing, but I don’t even know because I’m not really into mythology lol

❧

“Priscilla, are you sure this isn’t private property? I’m not really looking to get in trouble with the law this weekend,” Jaskier said, wringing his hands nervously as Priscilla wrenched open the iron gates that led to a supposed “mystical garden” that she had just happened to find. The squealing of the rusty hinges grated on Jaskier’s ears and he flinched instinctively at the loud whoop his best friend let out.

“Finally! I thought I’d never get those damned gates open. And so what if we’re on private property, there obviously hasn’t been anyone here in years,” she said, blowing golden blonde hair out of her face and picking up her backpack filled with various camera equipment that Jaskier didn’t dare try to name. Looking back at him with a cheeky grin, Priscilla all but skipped inside the garden, calling out behind her, “You scared, Jas?”

“No!” he shouted after her, absolutely lying, and followed her inside, gaping at the huge hedges that towered over him, lining the inside of the gates and making it impossible for anyone on the outside to look in. As Jaskier traveled further inside, trying to catch up to Priscilla who’d  _ left him,  _ he discovered that the hedges created a maze, starting at the entrance and presumably ending in the center of the garden. “Priscilla, really? A  _ maze?  _ I could have been studying for my finals!” he shouted. The chilly October wind made his face feel numb, and he regretted not bringing a proper jacket.

“Priscilla? This isn’t funny!” Jaskier’s heart sped up at the lack of a response, and he spun in a circle, trying to find an exit and seeing nothing but enormous hedges blocking his view of anything but the sky. “Oh gods,” he whispered, closing his eyes and trying to control his breathing. He shouldn’t have agreed to come, he should have known this was just Priscilla’s stupid way of pranking him. Why the hell did he think it would be a good idea to leave his phone in the car? How far in the garden  _ was _ he?

Sucking in a shaky breath, Jaskier stuck out his left hand and let it brush against the side of the maze, praying that the whole “stick to the left side of the maze and you’ll find your way out” thing was true.

Hours had passed and the sun had set, and Jaskier wanted to drop to his knees and cry. His voice was hoarse from screaming Priscilla’s name, and his feet were aching from the constant walking. He’d seen the entirety of the maze from outside the gates as he and Priscilla drove by. It had looked so  _ small,  _ so why did it feel like he’d been walking for miles?

Jaskier let out a pained gasp as his foot got caught in a sharp dip in the ground hidden by the overgrown grass and he fell down hard, his hands and knees scraping against the sharp rocks and pebbles half-buried in the surface of the dirt. Trembling breaths turned into choked sobs and small whimpers, and Jaskier let his head fall to the frosty ground with a small thump.

“Please,” he whispered, sitting up and hugging his knees to his chest, wincing as he jostled his ankle. “Please, someone  _ help me. _ ”

But nobody was going to help him. He was alone in a strange, seemingly endless garden, and it was cold and he was probably going to freeze to death before Priscilla came back in the morning and found him. Gods, Jaskier hoped she’d gone home instead of continuing to look for him. His only consolation at the moment was that at least Priscilla was safe and warm and not in his place.

Balling his numb fingers into fists, nails biting into his palms and drawing a faint spark of pain, Jaskier stood again, grasping the side of the hedges to heave himself up. His ankle throbbed painfully, pulsing in beat with the ache in his head and feet, but Jaskier soldiered on, inching forward to who knows where.

Had it been minutes? Hours? The sun was still nowhere to be seen and Jaskier felt lightheaded. His mouth was dry as a desert and Jaskier groaned at the sound of water ahead. Great, he was hallucinating now. But as he continued his endless march forward, the bubbling sound of water hitting stone echoed in his ears, getting louder the closer he got, and Jaskier soon found himself stumbling towards the noise as fast as he could, limping heavily on his left ankle but barely registering the pain.  _ Just a little further… _

Jaskier burst into a clearing, the hedges curving to form a neat circle around a gorgeous marble fountain. The moonlight bounced off the polished stone, bathing it in an ethereal glow. Fresh, clean water cascaded from the tiers of the fountain and spilled over into the elegantly carved basin at the bottom, and Jaskier would have cried if he had any tears left in his body. Dropping to his knees in front of the fountain, Jaskier cupped his hands and dipped them in the cool water, bringing it to his lips and moaning at the feel of it filling his mouth and wetting his throat.

After drinking his fill, probably much too quickly going by his slight urge to vomit, Jaskier sat leaning against the base of the fountain, head tipped back and breathing heavily. He should look around, find some place to get out of the icy wind. Maybe the center of the garden had some helpful maps laying around? Yeah right.

After he’d heaved himself up with a groan, Jaskier let his eyes drift over his surroundings. The moon had been covered, clouds drifting lazily by and rudely cutting off Jaskier’s only light source. Not that there was much to see. The fountain was the only thing in sight, save for the shadowy figure of a man directly across from him on the other side. A glint of metal caught Jaskier’s eye and he bent down to read a golden plaque embedded in the fountain that he’d missed in his haste. He squinted, trying to make out the words in the low light, bending down awkwardly to keep his weight off his ankle and trying to tune out the distinctive sound of rustling leaves behind him.

_ “He who dares to drink from my fountain shall face my horrible wrath, for I turn my enemies to stone with a single kiss, and no earthly thing can break this curse.” _

“Shit…” Jaskier mumbled, shivering at the blast of cool air brushing against the shell of his ear. It felt strangely like someone breathing. The silhouette of the man across from him made Jaskier straighten up and walk towards it, curious to see who it might be. “Hello?”

No response.

The frost covered blades of grass crunched under Jaskier’s boots, his left leg threatening to give out as he made his way around the fountain.

He inched forward, trying to get a good look at the man’s face in the darkness. The rustling sound of leaves had gotten louder as he walked but there was no breeze and the air was icy and still. He stopped a mere two feet from the man, leaning in close.

Moonlight bounced off the silhouette as the clouds cleared, revealing a marble statue of a muscular man, donned in armor and wielding a sword in one hand, the other strapped to his back. The man’s lips were twisted into a scowl and his fists were clenched tightly, like he was bracing himself.  _ Bracing himself to be turned to stone as the monster kissed him,  _ Jaskier thought, before laughing at himself. There was no way the plaque was real. This was probably some abandoned Halloween exhibit. A maze with a creepy fountain prop in the center.

Another brush of cool air against his neck sent shivers up his spine, and Jaskier whipped around to see a woman standing directly behind him, so close that their noses were almost touching.

The woman was wearing white rags that hung off her emaciated form, and long, greasy brown hair spilled limply down her shoulders and back, forming a sort of curtain around her face. A small sound akin to giggling was wrenched from the still figure, and Jaskier took a hesitant step back, putting a couple inches between them. The woman tilted her head up slowly, her hair parting on either side of her face.

Jaskier screamed.

The woman lunged.

Rotting flesh hung in flayed strips from the woman’s bloodied face, exposing her teeth in a grotesquely exaggerated smile. Bite marks pocketed her skin, chunks of flesh missing and creating dips in her arms and legs. The skin around the bites was a polished white, gently glowing in the faint moonlight, and Jaskier wanted to be sick as he realized what he was looking at.

_ “You’ve drank from my fountain and now you must pay, sweet thing… I have been so hungry, and you look so delicious… Look at what happens why I try to eat, my sweet, I’m turning myself into STONE!” _ The woman shrieked, screaming in anger as Jaskier threw himself to the side and out of range of her clawed hands. 

Panting harshly, Jaskier turned and ran back into the maze, trying to muffle his pained whimpers as his ankle was jostled. Jaskier lost count of how many turns he’d taken, his heart skipping a beat every time he ran into a dead end. His breath came out in white puffs of chilled air, and Jaskier wanted to cry each time he heard the woman calling for him.

_ “My sweet thing, where have you gone?” _ She called out in a raspy, horrid voice that reminded Jaskier of nails on a chalkboard.  _ “Don’t make me turn you to stone like that dreadful man who came to kill me, dearest, I can’t eat stone…” _

There! A faint light was shining just beyond the turn in the hedges.

Picking up his pace, Jaskier gritted his teeth and ignored the feeling of fire licking up his ankle. He crashed through the hedges, falling onto his knees heavily and looking up frantically, trying to spot Priscilla’s car in the… the clearing?

Jaskier fisted his hair tightly, trying not to scream in frustration. How was he back in the center of the maze?

Footsteps sounded behind him and Jaskier twisted around to see the woman leaning over him, the smell of rotten flesh and infection making its way into his nostrils.

Jaskier had to hold back a gag as he scrambled backwards, his ankle burning as he stood, gripping the base of the fountain for support. “If you’re so hungry, why did you turn him to stone?” Jaskier said, hoping to distract the woman and run around to the other side of the fountain and back into one of the various exits in the clearing leading back into the maze. “Why not turn him back and eat him?”

The woman hissed, her bloody smile making Jaskier flinch.  _ “Only true love’s kiss can counter mine and undo my curse… How am I supposed to find his true love when I’m stuck in this damned garden for all eternity and he’s been trapped like that for hundreds upon hundreds of years?” _

Inching back around the fountain as the woman spoke, Jaskier was just about to turn and book it for the nearest exit when the woman screamed and sprinted towards him.

_ “Not so fast, my sweet!” _ She cackled as Jaskier cried out, twisting out of her reach and knocking into the statue of the man behind him. The marble sword dug painfully into his back and Jaskier’s eyes widened.

Mumbling a rushed “fuck it”, Jaskier stretched on his tiptoes and kissed the marble statue’s ice cold lips. Nothing was happening. Of course nothing was happening, this had been a stupid, stupid plan and now he was going to die here, oh gods-

The woman’s hysterical laughter filled the air. She stepped towards him slowly, like a cat toying with its prey. Jaskier whimpered and clung to the statue, putting it between them. As the woman got closer, Jaskier shut his eyes, not wanting to see his death coming. His heart was beating painfully fast in his chest and he barely registered the feeling of cold stone turning warm and soft under his palms.

“ _ Please, _ ” he whispered, desperation and panic making his voice crack. “ _ Please help me… _ ”

A sudden shove had Jaskier sprawling on the ground, gasping as his ankle shifted uncomfortably underneath him. He pushed himself up on his elbows and gaped at the scene before him. A man with hair like the moonlight surrounding them was holding a gleaming silver sword, slashing at the woman before him. A horrible scream split the air as the sword made contact with the woman’s arm, metal slicing through stone and flesh like they were warmed butter, and Jaskier gagged as the limb fell to the ground with a wet thud.

“How do you like that silver?” The man growled, voice like thunder, and while the woman was distracted by the loss of her right arm, brought his sword down in one powerful swing, cutting right through her spinal column and decapitating her. Jaskier let out a whimper as the head rolled and came to a stop near his elbow.

Crouching beside him, the strange not-a-statue-anymore man helped Jaskier sit up, and Jaskier gasped softly as he met the man’s eyes. Cat’s eye pupils, dilated in the low light, stared at him intensely as his golden irises seemed to swirl and glow in the moonlight.

“Are you alright?” his savior asked, helping him slowly stand and catching him when his leg gave out.

“How…” Jaskier trailed off, the adrenaline wearing off and leaving him suddenly exhausted and upset. “I-I don’t understand, you were a  _ statue _ a couple minutes ago. Who even are you? And what  _ was _ she?” he asked, hissing in pain as he shrugged the man’s hands off his shoulders and took a step back.

The man let out a slow breath and stepped forward, gently guiding Jaskier to sit on the edge of the fountain.

“I’m Geralt of Rivia, a School of Wolf Witcher. I was hired to hunt that woman, a demigod. She was wreaking havoc on the village near here and turning people to stone once she’d lured them here.” Geralt paused and looked at him strangely. “Who are you, and what part of the continent are you from? I don’t recognize your clothing style.”

Jaskier’s eyebrows drew together and he sniffled because apparently he was crying now, great. “I’m Jaskier of… California. And what the hell is a Witcher?”

“Jaskier, what year is it?” Geralt asked, looking mildly panicked.

“…2020-”

“ _ What?  _ Okay. Okay, okay, this is fine.” standing up, Geralt looked like he was about to either vomit or pass out, which, same. He whipped back around to face Jaskier, making him jump. “Okay, Jaskier. Here’s the plan: You take me to Kaer Morhen and we try to find out if any of the other Wolf Witchers are still alive? Good? Good,” He said, walking away at a very fast pace.

Jaskier blinked and then shouted after him, “Geralt,  _ wait _ you bastard, my ankle! And for the record, I’m not taking you anywhere! I have finals the day after tomorrow!”

In a flash, Geralt was back by his side and scooping him into his arms like he weighed a feather, which was more than a little hot, but now was not the time! “Jaskier, if you take me to Kaer Morhen I’ll give you so many crowns you’ll be able to swim in them.”

“…what’s a crown made of, Geralt?”

“Solid gold, why?”

“Nothing! Nothing, my heroic savior! Take me back to my apartment and we’ll be heading towards this Kaer Morhen place as soon as the sun’s up!” Jaskier chirped, wrapping his arms around Geralt’s neck and letting the strong arm underneath his thighs keep his ankle off the ground.

Holy shit, if Geralt was telling the truth Jaskier would be set for the rest of his life! Fuck the finals!

As Geralt somehow navigated through the hedges and back to the start of the maze, he absently rubbed circles into a sleepy Jaskier’s back. “Hey Jaskier? How did you break the demigod’s curse on me?”

“Oh, she said somethin’ about true love’s kiss or wh’tever,” he slurred, exhausted beyond belief and yawning so wide that tears came to his eyes. Right before he drifted off, Jaskier heard a startled “ _ what?! _ ”, but that was a conversation for not-sleepy Jaskier. Nuzzling into Geralt’s neck, Jaskier made a soft, contented noise and fell asleep, dreaming of silver haired warriors with big swords (there was a dick joke somewhere in there) and even bigger hearts.

❧

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos + Comments are appreciated!  
> Extra love to anyone who spotted the Wild Hunt reference ;)  
> Here’s my [Tumblr](https://thefoxssocks.tumblr.com/)!


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